Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Bright Smile, Dark Eyes

I recently came across this song by Josh Ritter entitled “Bright Smile.” It’s been getting a fair amount of airplay on the ipod these days, so I thought I’d share it with you along with some thoughts. Here’s the video that accompanies the song, so you can follow along wherever you are.


You’ll note that there are a couple of literary or historical references throughout the song. For instance, in the third stanza, he mentions Calamity Jane, Casanova, and a certain Darling Clementine.

Martha Jane Canary rose to some notoriety as Calamity Jane in the Wild West of the 1870’s. She befriended and claimed to have married (though this is disputed) one James Butler Hickok. Hickok, who himself rose to notoriety as Wild Bill, was prone to both gambling and paranoia. When playing poker, he always sat in the corner, fearing that otherwise, someone would sneak up behind him. On August 1, 1876, when Wild Bill sat down to play cards, the corner seat was not available. As a result, Wild Bill was sitting with his back toward the door when Jack McCall walked in, lifted his .45 to the back of Wild Bill’s head, and pulled the trigger. At the time of his death, Wild Bill had in his hands a pair aces and a pair of eights, or, as it has come to be known in poker lore, a “Dead Man’s Hand.” When Jane received word of what had happened, she unsuccessfully went after Jack McCall with a meat cleaver. He was later hanged. Jane was married numerous times, but people say she was always fondest of Wild Bill and even asked to be buried next to him. As for how she earned her nickname? One story says that Jane liked to tell men that to pursue her was to “court calamity.” Calamity, I suppose, was something of which a man named Wild Bill was never afraid.

And then there’s the story of Giacomo Casanova, a handsome and charming Venetian whose adventures spanned the better part of the 1700’s. His restless heart did not permit him to any more than dabble in a great many occupations: law clerk, novelist, playwright, alchemist, philosopher, diplomat, spy, and magician. The last of these would land him a five year prison sentence for witchcraft, but quite appropriately for a magician, or perhaps a witch, he escaped. Like Wild Bill Hickok, Casanova had an inclination to gamble, and he made millions after setting up a state lottery. Of course, Casanova is best known for his womanizing. In his autobiography, he mentions his most memorable 122 conquests. He summed up his philosophy on love: "Real love is the love that sometimes arises after sensual pleasure: if it does, it is immortal; the other kind inevitably goes stale, for it lies in mere fantasy." For all his studies in love, Casanova, it would appear, never found happiness. During his final years, he lived the solitary life of an uncelebrated librarian and wrote his memoirs “to keep from going mad or dying of grief.”

Clementine was the main character in an Old West folk song, which I remember singing in my first grade music class. Of course, as with many children’s stories or verses, this song is much darker than I remember. The song is about a miner that falls in love with a fellow miner’s daughter, named Clementine. Clementine was chasing ducks into a lake, when she stubbed her toe and fell in. Because her lover did not know how to swim, he could only watch from the shore as Clementine died. Thus, he bellows, “Oh my darling, oh my darling, Oh my darling, Clementine! You were lost and gone forever. Dreadful sorry, Clementine. ” However, his sorrows, as you will see, are short-lived, “How I missed her! How I missed her,/ How I missed my Clementine,/ But I kissed her little sister,/ I forgot my Clementine.” What? This is a children’s song? But wait, there’s more. At this point, Clementine, as you can imagine, is not a happy camper. She has no other recourse but to come back as a ghost to haunt her former lover’s dreams; “In my dreams she still doth haunt me,/ robed in garments soaked in brine.” But Clementine is out of luck. The song ends with the miner telling us how he’s moved on, “How in life I used to hug her, Now she's dead, I draw the line.” Yikes. Dreadful sorry, Clementine.

Earlier in the song, Josh Ritter refers to a fourth historical character – French philosopher and logician Pierre Abelard. Abelard was the premier philosopher of the early 1100’s. Thousands of people from all over Europe came to hear him lecture. His brilliance, charisma, and success soon landed him the position of canon and Chair at Notre-Dame. He was on top of the world. And then he fell in love. A young girl named Heloise, brilliant in her own right, moved to Notre-Dame with her uncle, a canon named Fulbert, and she soon fell under the tutelage of Abelard. Abelard and Heloise began a love affair until Fulbert caught heed and separated the two. Abelard and Heloise then had to see each other in secret, until she got pregnant, at which point, the two ran off to Brittany. Uncle Fulbert was not a happy camper. To appease Fulbert, Abelard proposed a secret wedding that would legitimize the union. (A public marriage was impossible, given Abelard’s vow of celibacy.) Heloise would have preferred to remain a mistress, but she finally relented. Fulbert, meanwhile, let slip word of the marriage and soon Heloise was bombarded with questions. Heloise denied the allegations of marriage and even joined a convent to escape suspicion. When Fulbert received word of this, he erroneously assumed that Abelard had abandoned his niece and sought revenge. He broke into Abelard’s room in the middle of the night and castrated him, which disqualified Abelard as a priest, ecclesiast, and husband. Abelard was ruined professionally and he joined a monastery. Heloise had to bear a worse fate, it appears. She was still in love with a man that was no longer capable of loving. The letters that Heloise wrote to Abelard from her convent, which document her torment, can be found here.

Indeed, 18th century English Poet Alexander Pope retold the story of Abelard in his poem “Eloise to Abelard.” In it, he includes the famous line:

How happy is the blameless vestal's lot! The world forgetting, by the world forgot. Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind! Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd.

Of course, the third line provided the inspiration for the Charlie Kaufman film “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” which starred Jim Carrey, Kate Winslet, Kirsten Dunst, and Mark Ruffalo. a scene of which you will find below. The movie is a modern re-telling of the story of Abelard and Heloise.





So, how does this post end? How am I going to tie all these seemingly disparate stories together? Easy. You see, first we started with a song by a 21st century musician, named Josh, and then we met a 19th century Jane, a Bill with two aces up his sleeve, and a guy named Jack with a .45. We met an 18th century Italian librarian who had known better days and a 49er, his two daughters, one of whom was a Clementine, and, lest we forget, her apologetic lover. And then of course, there was a 12th century Parisian philosopher, his dear Heloise, and her vindictive uncle Fulbert. This, in turn, led us to an 18th Century Pope and back to a modern day Charlie, and his troop of actors: Jim, Kirsten, Mark, and Kate, who herself played a Clementine in the above movie. And now there’s only one person left to meet - John Graham. And now that you’ve met him, I can say that all 19 people you’ve met so far are within 6 degrees of separation of the actor that played John Graham in the movie “In the Cut,” which also starred Mark Ruffalo, namely, Kevin Bacon.

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

And Then There Were Two?

Here's a follow-up to a story I mentioned a few posts back. It appears that Lonesome George may not be so lonesome for much longer. NY Times story.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

For the Dogs

Well folks, this whole pet food recall fiasco is getting more ridiculous by the day. Awhile back, the FDA recalled several canned dog and cat foods, due to a contaminated batch of wheat gluten. Originally, people speculated that some rat poison accidentally got mixed in with the wheat gluten, which seemed plausible enough. What was interesting at the time was the sheer volume of dog foods that were affected by the recall. The list included Wal-Mart's budget-friendly Ol' Roy, which I understand costs about $0.25/lb, but also its pricey competitors which often cost 4 or 5 times that. You had to wonder, was it all the same stuff?

For my part, I was not particularly concerned about the recall. When my dog was a pup, he often had stomach issues, which led me to conclude that he was allergic to wheat. Unfortunately, most dog foods contain sizable amounts of wheat, in some shape or form. After some research, I settled upon Blue Buffalo brand dog food, a super-fancy-pants natural dog food which was free of wheat, corn, and soy. Unlike most dog foods, which have all kinds of fillers and by-products, Blue Buffalo contained only the best ingredients. It was free of all steroids, antibiotics, artificial preservatives, and by-products. Indeed, their ingredient list was better than that of most things I consume! Of course, with that came the steep price of $1.33/lb. Yikes. Still, if I could avoid the hassle of having to wake up at 3am and again at 4:30 am to let my dog out, it was well worth it. Plus, I had the peace of mind in knowing that my dog was eating well, which is especially important for a dog that will live forever.

Meanwhile, the FDA would periodically expand the recall. Now included were certain dry foods and dog treats. A few days ago, the FDA found contamination in certain Rice glutens and proteins. Again, I was not worried, because my brand of dog food, for which I pay an arm and a leg, did not contain such things. Only the best ingredients, remember? You can imagine my surprise when I logged onto the FDA website this morning to find that my pup's doggie biscuits were being recalled for rice gluten contamination. This had to be a mistake, I thought. First of all, to be technical, they weren't even biscuits. They were 'health bars' of 'unsurpassed nutrition.' They were even BAKED for crying out loud! But more importantly, they didn't contain any rice gluten... or wheat gluten... or the gluten of anything. I read the label. I re-read the label. No glutens! Phew, for a minute there, I felt like i was an irresponsible parent. But wait...

I went to their website to find this notice: The attached press release reads, in relevant part:
It should be noted the "BLUE" canned dog and cat food products were not formulated or labeled to contain rice protein concentrate, and that the manufacturer, American Nutrition, Inc. added the rice protein concentrate to these products without Blue Buffalo Company's knowledge or consent. For this reason, Blue Buffalo Company is concerned that it can not have any faith in the integrity, or the accuracy of the ingredient labels of any of its products manufactured by American Nutrition. Therefore Blue Buffalo is withdrawing all products manufactured by American Nutrition, including products that American Nutrition claims do not contain rice protein. The FDA investigation into the inclusion of the rice protein by American Nutrition in Blue Buffalo's products is ongoing.

I'm sure there's a healthy round of blame gaming being played throughout the dog food industry these days. Frankly, I'll never know whose fault it is that my dog treats are potentially fatal. I'm thankful that my dog isn't exhibiting any symptoms of illness to date. I've decided to take back both the biscuits and the unopen bag of dry food I recently purchased. With the recall continually being expanded, you never can be too sure. I've further decided to make my dog a home-diet for the next 4 to 6 weeks or until the dust settles from this melamine contamination scare.

But just when I thought I had matters under control, I came across a NY Times article suggesting that the melamine-contaminated rice protein has found its way into chickens at 38 Indiana farms. These chickens were marked for human consumption. At the same time, 8 pork producers in 7 states have been potentially contaminated with melamine after their pigs were fed contaminated dog food. In another report, it appears that melamine is openly and intentionally added as a filler in animal feed in China; "What? Poison? I eat this stuff by the fistful!"

At this rate, dog food may soon be the safest thing for us all to eat.